You think you're going to see a romantic comedy -- then, less than 10 minutes into the flick, you realize that the film you're watching is not only unfunny and predictable, but also borders on being soft-core porn. Not a good "first date" movie, if you ask me.

Good Luck Chuck, directed by Mark Helfrich, suffers from the "romantic comedy" disease of being predictable and generic -- which is probably why it stars Jessica Alba and Dane Cook in the first place. The film pushes the envelope even further, though, by failing to deliver any sort of adequate dialogue or plot. What's left are scenes that show Alba making an fool of herself, fixed in between an abundance of unnecessary boob shots.

The beginning of the movie features 10-year-old Charlie (Cook), refusing to kiss a Goth girl in a game of Spin-the-Bottle. Vampira's revenge? She places a hex on him: Every woman he sleeps with will marry the next man she meets.

Fast forward to the future, and Charlie meets Cam (Alba) at his ex-girlfriend's wedding.

The two seem to hit it off, but Cam repeatedly turns down his persistent flirtation and invitations to dinner.

The rest of the movie follows Charlie as he relentlessly chases after Cam, while every girl in a 5-foot radius is also hitting on him.

When Charlie realizes that women believe he really is their "lucky charm" (i.e. they'll find their soulmate if they sleep with him), Charlie then decides to make a mature and gentlemanly decision -- to take advantage of every girl he meets. Literally.

Here on after, there is a montage of sex scenes in which Charlie sleeps with numerous girls, including his extremely overweight secretary. To be honest, it was surprising he made it through the entire story without catching crabs.

It's obvious that Good Luck Chuck was trying to reach a balance between comedic vulgarity and underlying morality, which was well achieved in both comedies Superbad and Knocked Up. It's also obvious, however, that it failed miserably in this film.

If the 23 sex scenes featuring a nude Cook don't have you running out of the theater, then the horrible screenwriting will.

Filled with trashy one-liners and corny conversation, the film really only appeals to those who have a sense of humor equal to that of a hormonal 13-year-old boy.

And to you 13-year-old boys -- sorry, Alba doesn't even show anything on screen.

Although the running time for the movie is only an hour and a half, those 90 minutes are excruciatingly painful. It took an incredible amount of willpower to not walk out of the theater and demand my $5.50 back.

So, all in all, save the money and put it toward your next case of beer.

Even Natty Light would probably be better than this film. Better luck next time, Chuck.

Grade: D-