Sitting atop his little bed, in his little room, the big man told his story. It was the story of his rise as a high schooler. A story that also included his decision to leave the Penn State football team.

But his story is not unique in that regard. Antonio Logan-El isn't the first Penn State offensive lineman in this situation. Before him, it was Joel Holler and Wyatt Bowman and Mark Farris and Brian Borgoyn. For a variety of reasons, some of Penn State's top-recruited linemen don't last.

Regardless, Logan-El's story isn't a tragedy. He won't be on the field for tomorrow's Blue-White game, but that's OK. His life has taken a positive new direction.

"I fell in love with academics and school because I found a major that I really love, which is [crime, law and justice]," said Logan-El, who is a rising sophomore. "Even if I just have to go to school and work towards my degree, I'm totally fine with that."

As he spoke last week, it was clear he wasn't upset or spiteful. In fact, he was calm and comfortable. Logan-El was at peace, playing video games with a buddy in his tiny freshman dorm room.

While his decision is certainly unfortunate, it was probably the best for all parties.

Where it began

Last year, Logan-El's collegiate career started dramatically. To the dismay of Maryland fans, he committed to Penn State before a live television audience.

Two years earlier, after one impressive afternoon at a Maryland high school camp, Logan-El had earned a scholarship. One sitting was all he needed to pique the interest of Maryland's coaches.

During the camp, Logan-El went one-on-one against a five-star defensive line recruit, Melvin Alaeze. The big man swiftly pancaked Alaeze. Afterward, Maryland coach Ralph Friedgen called Logan-El over to his golf cart for a brief, frank chat.

"I want to offer you a scholarship," Friedgen said. Logan-El orally committed as a rising high school sophomore.

But in January 2006, at the ESPNZone in Baltimore, he pulled hats from his top schools: Penn State, Maryland, Tennessee and Florida. He kept the crowd on edge before holding up a photo of he and Penn State coach Joe Paterno.

"Me and JoePa have a nice little date for the next four or five years," he told the cameras.

Earlier this month, however, his career ended with less bombast.

Where it went

About two weeks into winter conditioning -- after a redshirt season he thought was productive -- the world around Logan-El began to crumble.

On a Wednesday during the workout period, his grandfather was hospitalized for an illness.

On Friday, Logan-El's mother drove to State College to bring him home. She climbed from the car and delivered more bad news. She told him his father, whom he had only known three months at that point, was hospitalized after a car accident. He was thrown through the windshield and needed facial surgery.

Logan-El remembers walking from the second to third floor in Washington's George Washington Hospital. His father was in surgery on the second floor. His grandfather in Intensive Care Unit on the third.

On Sunday, after his grandfather and father were released, Logan-El returned to school. His family members declined to be interviewed for this story.

Then he received more bad news: Doctors thought his mother had a brain tumor. Turns out she had migraines, but Logan-El was still shaken.

Logan-El said Paterno was "pretty supportive." Paterno gave him his home phone number to call and told Logan-El to take some time away from football.

Logan-El said he returned to Penn State four to six weeks later and told Paterno he wanted to resume team workouts. Logan-El said Paterno put him on an individual weight-training regiment. He worked at it for a few weeks, gradually building back stamina.

Then, he said Paterno called after about two weeks to tell Logan-El he wouldn't be participating in the spring practices and wouldn't get to dress for tomorrow's Blue-White game. Logan-El said Paterno told him he'd have the opportunity to renew his scholarship after a productive summer with the team.

"It was like a curveball really took me when I heard that," Logan-El said.

His decision

Logan-El, feeling abandoned, walked away.

"Penn State has been great to me. All the coaches on the coaching staff have shown me great support when my family was going through that ... I have nothing against Joe Paterno. He's a great coach; he helped me mature," he said.

"I respect him and who he is. I don't agree with his decision. Just what I went through as a whole, I don't think I could go back."

At times Paterno questioned Logan-El's drive to play. Penn State coaches were not made available for comment on this story. Paterno briefly mentioned Logan-El's situation the first day of spring practice back on March 23.

"He's got to make up his mind whether he really wants to play football," Paterno said at the time.

Logan-El insists he was committed to the program when he approached Paterno about returning. But after having left, Logan-El decided that life without football isn't so bad.

Logan-El is able to see that there is life after football -- whether that's right now, four years from now or after a 20-year NFL career. And he recognizes that. And that's why his decision to leave will work out.

"There's certain things that being a football player that you miss out on," he said. "Because you're a football player, you can't sit in the student section and cheer the football team on."

He said he'll evaluate his options at the end of this semester, once he's released from his scholarship. He'll wait to see if he has any offers from schools that originally wanted him. But his life is written in ink, no room for erasures.

So it'll be OK if nothing turns up and he stays at Penn State as a full-time student. It'll be OK if he doesn't put on another college football jersey or if he never makes it to the NFL.

Even still, people still remind him of his promise.

"Well, I appreciate the compliments and everything like that, but that's your dream," he said. "I have to live my dream."