Five years have passed and so has the anger, but the painful memories still remain. Penn State pitching coach Jocelyn Forest still has trouble coming to grips with the fact that her story isn't just another "afternoon special".

Nearing the end of her senior season at Cal-Berkeley, Forest discovered that her only sibling, Erika, had been found stabbed to death in her kitchen. In the midst of a divorce with her troubled husband, Erika fell victim to a brutal and gruesome murder with a kitchen knife. Her husband, Roger, tried to commit suicide after the homicide but was unsuccessful.

At the time of the findings, Forest was in the circle in the middle of an extra-inning pitching duel at UCLA. She pitched every inning for the Golden Bears and eventually was handed the loss in the 10th inning, 1-0.

For a perfectionist like Forest, the game never seemed as miniscule as it did after she heard the news. She immediately left the team to be with her family, including Taylor, Erika's 10-year-old son.

That meant the Golden Bears were without their senior ace heading to Tempe, Ariz., for a weekend series with defending champions, No. 1 Arizona. In the first game, Cal faced the Wildcats without Forest but still grinded out a 5-2 victory. The next day -- five years ago this Saturday -- and just one week since the murder, Forest was back in the circle and one-hit Arizona, striking out 15 in a 2-1 win.

"It was interesting because our team really pulled together for [Forest]," Cal softball coach Diane Ninemire said. "They didn't want to have to be the one to call and let her know that they lost to Arizona, so that team went out and swept Arizona for the first time ever here at Cal.

"That was just the beginning to that roll and really having a purpose and a meaning to what they were doing out there. The team really pulled together for her and for her sister."

Forest admits she was throwing with that extra something no other pitcher had -- anger. No team could defend against that weapon. Forest and the Golden Bears ravaged through the NCAA regionals all the way to the College World Series, a place Cal had visited for the past three years.

The 2002 season was different, though. Forest was pitching near perfection, and the team's motivation was unmatched. The will led Cal to its first ever women's championship with a win against familiar foe Arizona, 6-0. Forest's one-hit performance outmatched Wildcat Jennie Finch, a current member of the U.S. national team and one of the most recognizable names in the softball world.

"We ended up in a very tough regional," Forest said. "Our team just really bonded that year. It was so memorable. I always tell people it was almost magical. Just the way we came together ... we were just like, 'You guys, we're going to do this. It doesn't matter where we go. We're going to do this and nobody is going to stop us'."

Not even the death of a sibling.

Forest didn't allow a single run in the World Series punctuated with a 4-0 record and a 0.50 ERA in the championships. She was an easy choice for Most Valuable Player.

"It would've been more perfect if that [tragedy] didn't happen, but it was the perfect ending to my career. It was definitely a challenge for me. It was something that I'm very proud of to this day."

Forest left Cal with a 1.30 career ERA and a 103-42 record, but to the people who know her, the best thing about her story isn't in the numbers. Her will and commitment to her cause are what Forest and her former coach still attributes to her success.

"Knowing what her and her family had gone through over the past month of our season was more than anyone should ever have to bear," Ninemire said. "It was just a tremendous effort on her part to be able to keep her focus and keep her goal alive when it could've been so easy for her to have thrown in the towel and fall apart. Maybe it was the adrenaline, the rush, or just trying to get through every day."

Whatever it was that fueled Forest during the last stretch, her success inspired so many people, bringing several to tears. Forest doesn't necessarily think her story made her more dangerous in the moment, but to everyone else she was untouchable.

With some help from the Cal community, Forest's family was flown out to see her comeback in person. At a time when no one knew how focused or strong Forest would be after the tragedy, her pitching eventually crushed all doubts. Throughout Cal's run to the championship, Forest threw every pitch, and Ninemire was more than confident.

"She was just relentless out there ... just untouchable," Ninemire said. "Every pitch she pitched during those last games, I know she pitched in memory of her sister. More than anything, she just wanted to make sure she went out there and pitched in a way that her sister would be really proud of."

Five years after her death, Erika would see a lot of things to be proud of in her younger sister. Besides a successful end to her college career, Forest has taken her game as far as the Netherlands and is still pitching professionally for the New England Riptide. Recently she spent time as a pitching coach at Boston University and is now in her first year at Penn State.

She brings a tremendous amount of experience and talent to the Nittany Lion program, and her ability to relate to her players is something a lot of teams don't have at their disposal.

Forest had her share of high and low points in her college career. It took her a while to adjust to her role on the Cal team, but when she began pitching to her ability, there was no stopping her. Her training, time management and determination made her a well-rounded athlete. That helped her remain focused in tough times.

Now as a coach, Forest wants to help her players grow similarly. She was in the same place only five years ago, so whether it's help in the circle or out, her players are grateful to have a person they can relate to.

"She knows what's she's doing" junior pitcher Ashley Esparza said. "She's been there professionally and at the collegiate level. It's nice to have someone to rely on when we're not doing well. We can ask her what's going wrong, and she always knows."

Forest is happy to know that she is "syncing" well with her staff and has high expectations. So far, the pitching combination of Esparza and Jenn Reynolds has been stellar under Forest's guidance.

Besides pitching strategies and techniques, however, Forest wants her pitchers to accentuate a characteristic that got her through her years at Cal, especially her later appearances.

"I just want them to compete," Forest said. "I want them to have that fire to do well and really want to mow down whoever the competition is out there on the field with them at that moment and that game. I want them to be sharp mentally. Just be smart out there, and not just be physically good but mentally good."

Just like every Cinderella story, Forest's road wasn't easy. Her fight to the top is what makes her so relatable and admirable.

"What she can tell them was everything she put into it was well worth it, and she got the ring at the end of the story," Ninemire said. "She kept on believing in herself and her team, and she was able to put it all together.

"That story she can share with the players she's working with today is if they keep working and they keep dreaming, they can make their dreams come true. After all of the experiences she had here at Cal and going through losing her sister the way she did, she could probably do a good job anywhere with young ladies."

More than 2,500 miles away, Forest has another group of people who admire everything about her. Her family life in California has changed with Taylor now living with his maternal grandparents, her brother-in-law in jail for life without parole and her sister gone too soon.

At a time where the changes are still relatively new, Forest isn't too sure her life in the East is certainly the best. Her family is in the middle of physical reminders creating a constant struggle that Forest sometimes wishes she was sharing with her family.

Forest has been wanting to coach at such a high level and with athletes who are "capable of going places", but the fact that she's not as involved with or close to her family's struggles is a challenge.

"I can't say it's helped with the moving on process," Forest said. "I feel like it has been hard because I can't be there in person with my family. Obviously, it's something the whole family has been dealing with, and I've kinda been detached from it."

Though Forest is detached from the physical reminders, she often thinks back to her younger days, when Erika would yell at her for sneaking into her room and stealing her clothes. From that memory she reflects on her college years when Erika was one of her biggest supporters on and off the softball diamond.

Without hesitation, Forest said she knows her sister would be very proud of her accomplishments in her college career and now as a coach at Penn State. It is a form of closure that Forest was able to capture from one of her final moments with Erika.

"The last time I actually saw her and talked to her in person was on New Year's Eve [2001]," Forest said. "We were just sitting up together, and I told her, 'I know I was such a brat growing up, but I always admired you.' And she said, 'Well, now the roles are reversed'. I'm just glad I got to say that to her. She'd be very proud of me, definitely."