Today is the first day of December, so I figure I'll just get this out of the way now: I hate Christmas. There, I said it.

My favorite holiday just passed. I spent my Thanksgiving doing three of my favorite things -- golfing, eating and spending time with my family. Everyone was pretty relaxed, I got to travel someplace warm, and in general, I had a great time. I came back to school Monday night feeling legitimately refreshed for the first time in years.

That all changed when I went to work on Wednesday. My place of employment has been playing Christmas music and has had Christmas displays up since mid-October. I was furious about it then, but I managed to block it out and even forget about it during the glorious week I spent not working.

I walked in the door and the first thing I heard was "I'm dreaming of a whiiiite Christmas..." and so on.

I muttered a few very discouraging words under my breath, punched in and proceeded to spread yuletide cheer through the store for the next five hours.

I don't hate Christmas for the usual reasons you hear from other Scrooges. Sure, I think it's a grossly over-commercialized holiday that has lost almost all of its true meaning, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't spend the third week in December searching for that perfect gift for every person on my list.

The thing that really gets me is that the Christmas season, supposedly a time for bringing people together, seems to tear them apart. For the last few days I've been playing mediator in my family while my brother and sister-in-law try to figure out how to properly parcel out their time on Christmas Day so as to step on the least amount of toes. You would think that the rest of my family would be happy they were able to make the 1,800-mile trip up, but you'd be wrong.

Another thing that gets me is the way people "ask" about what others want for Christmas. I'm sure I'm not alone on this one, but if I can't name five different things I want in five different price ranges for five different relatives, I get harassed incessantly and threatened with a Christmas morning of boxer briefs, socks, undershirts and cheap golf balls.

Tis the season to be jolly, indeed.

The last time I checked, Christmas was supposed to be spent enjoying friends, family, good food, good cheer and whatever your religion dictated you were supposed to be celebrating. Even atheists had a reason to cheer, as it meant time off from work or school. Christmas had everything.

Now? Now Christmas is a time for people to get angry, camp out in line to make sure their kid gets a Playstation 3, and so on. Maybe people should lay off the eggnog and take a step back. It'd be refreshing to see the more fortunate among us (that means everyone not living in a cardboard box) using the season to give thanks for what they do have and help the less fortunate, not complain about what they're lacking. I sound like a parent talking to a small child right now, but it really is true. If you get to spend the holiday season with family, and everyone gets along, be thankful.

When I was brainstorming this column, someone told me that people start celebrating Christmas so early because most of us need something to look forward to -- a light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. This is actually a pretty good explanation, but to me, it seems kind of sad that people need to constantly look forward to some arbitrarily designated holiday to get excited about life. But maybe I'm the crazy one. Who knows.

I'm going to hold out hope that my family, at least, will gain some semblance of perspective on the holidays. Usually my mother and I get sick of Christmas well before it arrives, so I have someone to share my misery with. If that doesn't happen, however, and people keep acting like bigger jerks during "Sparkle Season" than they do the rest of the year, I'll be looking for something to do early on the morning of Dec. 25.

Anybody know if golf courses are open then?