The air is getting brisker, leaves are changing colors, and students are back in school, which can only mean one thing - new fall TV lineups.
Between essential activities like sleeping and cooking, I find it difficult to squeeze in quality time in front of the tube.
After escaping the dorms and their limited channels and lineups, I do watch lots more TV now especially that my apartment's digital cable beckons. I must heed its call (and make the $60 a month worth it), so it's no surprise that this semester, I have watched more hours of TV than I have in my first two years here combined.
Plus, the old adage that TV can't teach you anything is crap. There are plenty of shows out there this fall that can give some great life lessons - you've just got to know where to look.
About 75 percent of my TV time is devoted to the greatest show ever made, Law & Order, but strictly the original episodes or Special Victims Unit, aka SVU. (Criminal Intent, or CI, is not even to be dignified with an insult.)
The new season of SVU premiered last Tuesday on NBC, though I have to say that its thinly-hatched plot of a rape victim-environmentalist turned terrorist did not adhere to classic SVU standards.
Elaborate child porn rings and tales of Tibetan sex slaves are more its style.
I'd also group Without a Trace under my favorite crime dramas umbrella. That show is damn poignant as well.
The great thing about Law & Order is that every episode always leaves you with something. After an hour of its quality programming I find myself musing, "You know, I learned something today!" like how to tell the sleazy guys from the good ones, or at the very least, if you commit a crime, first and foremost you should always "lawyer up."
In the interrogation room, that's how they get you.
Other more reality-esque shows like Trading Spaces and Extreme Makeover-Home Edition, can also help you and give you some really great apartment-renovating tips.
For me, I watch these shows strictly for entertainment purposes - I'm too lazy to find time to make a sofa out of feathers, canvas and some wood.
One show I do not really like is Grey's Anatomy. Yes, I can already hear the feminine cries of protest and disgust.
It is just too over the top for me - way too much drama. I hate the O.C., and I have never really watched Desperate Housewives either.
But one extremely superficial show I can't get enough of is America's Next Top Model.
It preaches good taste, poise, and if you want to be liked, how not to be an arrogant bitch, like Jade.
I also love Project Runway and Top Chef, but I know that's just because I have a competitive streak. And I love food.
You can never go wrong with comedy classics like South Park, The Simpson's and Family Guy for a good laugh.
About the only thing I've taken away from a Family Guy episode is increasing disgust for American Dad, its cheap political-minded knock-off. (Is terrorism funny yet? I don't think so.)
Some new shows have premiered, but I haven't had a chance to view very many. The only one I've seen is CBS's new series The Class, about a bunch of 20-somethings who were in third grade together.
Kind of funny, but all I imagine this show could impart to an audience is how to be incredibly awkward 10 years from now, which I'm sure most people will have a handle on anyway.
I can't believe they are still making new 7th Heavens. Dancing with the Stars makes me embarrassed for America.
I like The Office, and from my years of experience as a business intern, believe me when I say that it will truly prepare you for the real world.
Finally, in sum, anything on HBO is absolutely amazing. HBO needs to pick up Showtimes' Weeds, and then it won't be long before it takes over the world.
Because when it comes down to it, everyone wants to have Vincent Chase's life, Tony Soprano's respect, Carrie's sexpertise, and Ali G's political tact.These are things they just can't teach you in school.
