There's a 70-something coach on campus who has led his Penn State squads to dozens of championships. He totes almost more respect than stopwatches, from athletes and colleagues alike.

And most importantly, he maybe, just maybe, rocks the khakis and windbreaker better than that Paterno guy.

Bryant, Wooden, Paterno, Bowden and Groves.

Which of these doesn't belong?

Answer: False, they all do.

Not many people know of Penn State men's track and field and cross country coach Harry Groves, who is retiring following this year's track season after 38 years as a Nittany Lion.

Track and field and cross country just don't have the appeal of, nor do they generate the revenue of football or basketball, but that doesn't diminish the accomplishments of one of the sports' greatest coaches.

"Groves is a legend in track and field," senior thrower Scott Vernon said. "I can't tell you how many times at meets dozens of coaches will walk up to Groves to get advice or to say congratulations for something."

And why not? In the man's illustrious career, he's tutored some of the top athletes the world has ever seen. His coaching resume includes almost a dozen American record-holders, 20 national champions, over 200 All-Americans, a World Cup champion and 14 Olympians. The man literally taped a baton to Carl Lewis's right hand.

A true patriot, Groves-led U.S. teams triple jumped the Berlin wall to go stride for socialist stride with team U.S.S.R. on three occasions. When's Disney doing that one, Kurt Russell?

Wait, Russell? No. Once you've done a movie with Dakota Fanning, you've lost the testosterone needed to be a convincing Harry Groves. If it were up to us, the role would already have been promised to R. Lee Ermey of "Full Metal Jacket" and "Mail Call" fame.

Even if the project gets the green light, screenwriters will have trouble capturing the 53-year track life of the legendary leader, who started coaching when Perry Como ruled the AM airwaves and the Dodgers hadn't yet bolted from Brooklyn.

Frankly, the man wrote the book on running, and not the metaphorical kind, the ink and pages kind. You can find it on Amazon.com: Practical Coaching Techniques for Cross Country and Distance Running by Harry Groves, available in paperback.

But, it's the books the man could write which are most impressive. Groves has more stories than Dr. Seuss, most of them more amusing than anything the rhyming wordsmith could ever conjure.

The following is the summation of an exchange between Groves and New York Yankees owner George Steinbrenner.

Steinbrenner: You really like the Penn Relays meet better than the Olympics?

Groves: Oh yeah, I'd rather win a medal at Penn that at the Olympics.

Steinbrenner: Wow, how about that.

Shortly thereafter, the billionaire donated more than a million dollars to the meet. That's influence you can't buy.

"Someone who doesn't know him will think he's a tough guy," senior Dan Mazzocco said. "But he's really a good man at heart. He's just a character. He'll give you something serious about what's going on, and then he'll crack a joke. It's comedic relief more than anything.

"He's very much about being dedicated, but at the same time he thinks it should be a fun thing. Don't put any extra pressure on yourself."

Of course, under all the ridiculousness is the other part of the legend. The part his teams really get to know.

"He relates to his athletes," senior Chris Nirschel said, "and wants to see them do well for themselves and the school, not to make him look good. That's a trend you don't see in many coaches anymore."

"He gives athletes the benefit of the doubt," Mazzocco said. "I know he stuck by me through four years of track injuries, so I'm grateful for that. Some coaches will just cut you loose."

At practice, Groves tends to lurk. He's got Mr. Miyagi-like presence, reserved but wise. But, whenever one of his athletes is in need of some guidance, Groves is quick to help.

"Since Groves isn't my event coach, his guidance has been mostly in how best to prepare for a meet mentally," Vernon said. "How to get after a throw and really to promote the team aspect of the sport."

That emphasis on the team has earned Groves a career winning percentage upwards of 85 percent, winning over 750 meets, more than most could contemplate coaching, let alone winning.

"He has a way of explaining things so that no matter what, you understand what he means," Vernon said. "He has a firm grip on almost any situation and can tell you numerous experiences he has had with sometimes world-class athletes to compare to your situation."

"I think his experience has made him a great coach," Nirschel said. "He's come across many different types of athletes, all of which I'm sure have challenged him in different ways."

Groves' winning ways have earned him 14 NCAA District II coach of the year and four National Coach of the Year awards. The accolades continue to pile up even as his career winds down.

Groves, who still runs competitively, will step down this spring, retiring after a hall-of-fame career, leaving a Penn State program without its battle-tested leader.

Everywhere Groves' career has taken him was bettered by his presence, and every athlete he has coached has learned from his guidance.

He has coerced the Boss and coached the best, but was seemingly never too busy for a couple of collegiate journalists.

Always one to defer the spotlight, Groves deflects recognition, but we say it's time he got some.

So Coach, if you're ever looking for a good run around campus, don't call us. We couldn't keep up.

But if you need someone to hold the stopwatch...