Christian fraternity and sorority Alpha Nu Omega hosted a discussion last night on "The Down Low," a phrase given to black men in heterosexual relationships who cheat on their partners with other men.
Katrina Pierre, the sorority's secretary and public relations manager, said that although the term originated in the black community, it is not limited to it. For the purposes of their discussion, however, they were primarily dealing with the aspect of black men cheating on women with other men.
Another aspect of The Down Low is that the men who
have sex with other men do not identify themselves as gay or bisexual; one possible reason for this is that the men may not want to deal with the social stigma of homosexuality, Pierre said.
The group also mentioned JL King, who wrote the book On the Down Low. King now considers himself bisexual because although he dates only men, he still appreciates women.
Fraternity member Josh Walker said that in King's book, he said another reason men may go on The Down Low is because their women may not be interested in the "freaky stuff" in which they are interested.
The group showed R. Kelly's video for "Trapped in the Closet," to portray The Down Low experience. The video shows a pastor who catches his wife with another man and decides to reveal his own secret: that he has been sleeping with a man named Chuck for a year.
Pierre brought up the female perspective of The Down Low, noting that women are the victims and should hold men accountable for their actions. She added that more than an issue of sex, it is an issue of infidelity and a lack of trust.
Because The Down Low often brings HIV and AIDS into relationships, Pierre said that couples should be open and honest and that both members are equally accountable if they engage in unprotected sex.
Alicia Lewis, vice president of the sorority, said many men's Down Low encounters begin in jail.
"They feel they have urges they need to fill, so they have sex with another male or sometimes get raped," she said, referring to what she called "prison sexuality."
Lewis also said some justify The Down Low with a survival instinct where men feel the need to "release" their urges and are then "affected" when they get out of jail.
She added that because jails don't offer condoms to the men, they are forced to improvise, sometimes using potato chip bags, latex gloves or nothing at all, which allows disease to easily spread.
Pierre said many women feel it would be better if their men cheated on them with other women rather than men.
"It would hit at my femininity," she said.
Patrice Alston, president of the sorority, said The Down Low is an example of selfish ambition. "A lot of times these men don't want a relationship ... it's just lust," she said.
