Young college Fabio stands alongside the Lion Shrine, his arm resting on the statue, a strong wind swishing his shoulder-length hair around, his lacy cotton shirt and his tight leather pants.
Scarlet, the gorgeous Penn State woman, stands tall in front of Rec Hall, with flowing brown hair and a full-skirted, alabaster dress. She gravitates toward Fabio's incandescent image and freshly sculpted biceps.
He reaches for her hand, and whispers sweet words in her ear: "Just like my last girlfriend, I'll tell you you're the most beautiful girl in the world. These past three days have been amazing. Will you marry me?"
Scarlet doesn't hesitate as she says, "Yes, I will marry you. And now I must quickly rush to my computer, let the Facebook world know I'm "In a relationship," and insert overzealous amounts of clichéd Lifehouse lyrics in my AOL Instant Messenger profile."
Truth be told, I don't think the above is that far from reality.
Whether or not to date in college is a choice that nearly all students must make. A serious college relationship can take up a lot of time or quickly flush out a checking account.
I'll admit that I've never been in love, and after looking at the behavior of some college couples today, I'm not so sure I want to be. At my age, relationships just don't have the realism I need.
College relationships really shouldn't be about marriage. Somehow, we get caught up in the fantasy of relationship and not enough on the facts.
Marriage is a commitment that lasts a lifetime. Marriage means everything is done together and shared. Marriage is more serious than spending quality time and sharing a pint of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia together several times a week.
I'm led to believe that there are a surplus of college relationships because of the college mentality. It should come as no surprise that Penn State students enjoy drinking. After a few drinks, the Janet Reno look-alikes miraculously become Angelina Jolie. Feelings start opening, and hormones start flowing.
The level of public immaturity on the weekends here should be a good sign that most students aren't ready to be very serious, let alone have a serious relationship.
Yet alcohol appears to be the perfect way to test your preparedness for marriage. Take your significant other out to a party or bar with you any given Friday night. Enjoy a couple of beverages and see how often you look your partner in the eye. If your eyes start wandering to the body of another gentleman or lady, your mind is still in college and obviously not on marriage.
Another preparedness test for some is sex. It has a tendency to be healing and can easily become the central feeling in a relationship.
Feelings can get tangled and confused, and suddenly couples can find themselves believing their strong physical relationship foreshadows a strong, healthy marriage.
Even young couples who are uncomfortable with being sexually involved without the promise of marriage may face more pressure to get married.
Those who choose to become involved in an intense college relationship can easily miss out on some of the greatest years of their lives.
College should be about going out, meeting people and getting involved in groups. There's a larger perspective that's far greater than the narrow distance between you and your partner's eyes.
It seems that college dating is, unfortunately, more like group dating. No longer can couples discuss personal matters between themselves; instead, each partner must let everybody throw in their two cents on every relationship crisis they have. It's no longer about being romantic in private; instead, it's about couples lip-locking in the middle of a crowded hallway. It's no longer about keeping a relationship modest; instead, it's a social requirement to litter one's Instant Messenger profile with sappy poetry, a significant other's initials, the date they started their journey of love with a big, red heart.
Meanwhile, somewhere in America, Joe and Sally Sixpack are celebrating their 20th wedding anniversary by sitting on the porch together grimacing, wondering why the hell they rushed to get married, and both secretly wishing they still had their early 20s back to meet other people.
It's time for college relationships to be more mature, more real and more personal.
