There are two suicide attempts, an almost-rape, a big serpent monster, a couple priests, some star-crossed lovers, a comedy team of two goofballs, a little sex and a lot of love.

Real World: Philadelphia? Survivor? No way.

This is opera.

It's also Susan Boardman's description of The Magic Flute, the Penn State Opera Theatre production she is directing this weekend.

This is the first time Mozart's classic opera is being performed by the Opera Theatre, and also the first three-act production the Opera Theater company has ever staged.

Boardman said all the pieces finally fell into place for the opera to appear on stage at Penn State. For one, the Penn State Orchestra is available to perform with the singers this spring.

Even though the Opera Theatre is performing a semi-staged version, The Magic Flute also calls for an enormous and specific cast.

"We were really lucky this year. Several pieces, particularly the Queen of the Night's arias, are very demanding, but we had several students in the cast who are capable of hitting the incredibly high notes," Boardman said.

The Opera Theatre is bringing in a "ringer," though, with the performance of the Argentinian baritone Diego Baner, who is being brought in from Florida specifically for this production.

As if the technical demands weren't enough, the story of The Magic Flute is also a little more complex than the typical MTV reality show. The evil Queen of the Night schemes her way through the opera, set on overthrowing Sarastro, a powerful high priest. She also plots to keep her daughter Pamina away from Pamina's beloved prince Tamino. While the star-crossed lovers endure trials that test their love, Papageno, a hapless bird catcher, provides the comic relief. Papageno has his own set of romantic troubles, as he chases after his lady love Papagena. Enchanted objects are scattered throughout the opera, including, of course, a magic flute.

David Bruce (junior-voice performance) plays the character of Papageno.

"He's the lovable loser," Bruce said. "He leads a simple life, just sitting around, catching his birds and being pretty lazy. Then suddenly he's on a quest to find the love of his life who's just like him."

In a desperate moment, Papageno considers suicide, at which point Bruce tries to "salvage some seriousness" for his character. But after a pause, he admitted, "that ultimately is kind of funny, too."

Sasha Piastro (graduate-voice performance and pedagogy), who plays Pamina, said college students will enjoy the opera.

"I think they'll be surprised to see an opera in English and with dialogue," she said. "It's really very funny, and not just your typical story with some tortured lovers and, well, the devil."

Boardman stressed the importance of performing the English translation of the opera, as opposed to singing in its original German.

Brendan Buckley (graduate-voice performance and pedagogy), another cast member, agreed on the advantages of singing in English.

"It definitely helps. This opera has a lot of fantasy elements, with no real base in reality," he said. "That's our job as performers, though. We have to draw you in and make you feel for our characters."