I don't like flies. And I don't like mushrooms, mold or cats.

Or the Crayola color mac n' cheese, smelly people, macadamia nuts, obnoxious hoochie mamas (unless it's me), wet toes or candy corn.

But all these things pale in comparison to my biggest pet peeve: seeing a movie that I thought would be good turn out to be very, very hideously bad.

To avoid this unfortunate mood-ruining experience, I try to keep my expectations low or sometimes altogether skip movies I fear won't meet the hype. It's the reason I didn't see Legally Blonde 2 and why I wouldn't recommend A Beautiful Mind. It's just so annoying. It's like a peanut M&M without the nut.

So right now, after seeing Shark Tale about an hour ago, I feel like my face has been stuffed with fungus, my room has been painted an ugly orange, malodorous skanky girls are knocking at the door and my secret chocolate stash has been eradicated of its nutty cores.

When I originally heard about Shark Tale I thought in my stupid head that it could be good. But instead it's dim-witted, predictable and poorly written.

Shark Tale is the l-a-m-e pop-culture reference-infested story about a fish named Oscar (voiced by Will Smith) who thinks he's too fly for his average working class life.

He gets himself into a whole lotta trouble when he fakes his way to the top by taking credit for killing a great white shark. Unfortunately the shark happens to be the son of a mobster don, Don Lino voiced by -- who else? -- Robert DeNiro.

Other stereotypical characters flood the story: oddball-out vegetarian shark Lenny (voice of Jack Black), greedy boss Skyes (voice of Marty Scorcese), the down-to-earth she-loved-you-before-the-money Angie (voice of Renee Zellweger) and the sexy -- yes, I know it's a fish -- gold diggin' Lola (voice of Angelina Jolie).

This line-up could deliver a good time; after all, fellow computer animated Dreamworks movie Shrek 2 is both fabulous and abundant with redundant characters, story lines and happily ever after endings for all.

Somehow though, Shark Tale just isn't fabulous in any way. It tries way too hard to be funny and appealing to every possible audience. Loads of dull conversations intermitted with cheap jokes instead of just funny dialogue pollute the script worse than an ocean liner oil spill.

Yes, at first the whole "mob" getup is funny, but like the other gags the movie tries to pull, it gets old real fast. The countless references to films like The Godfather and Goodfellas become pitiful.

"Fo'get about it."

"What, do I look like a clown to you?"

"You'll be sleepin' with the fishes."

Then there's Will Smith's character, the "street" fish with his "fo' shizzie" stupid one-liners.

His bling bling and "hey, a lot of white fish can't do it" is just a sad attempt at pulling in "urban" audiences.

Perhaps the stupidest stunt, however, is the fish in the movie actually looking like the actors who voice them.

I'll admit that seeing Martin Scorsese as a blowfish is mildly funny, but my amusement ends with him.

As full of bright colors and fish the film may be, Shark Tale is as empty as a fish bowl after the cat got to it.