Revenge seems to be in vogue this spring. Two weeks ago, No. 1 and 2 at the U.S. box office were Kill Bill: Vol. 2 and The Punisher. Then, this past weekend, the top spot went to the Denzel Washington vehicle, Man on Fire. Fire is about Creasy, a former government assassin who, after a girl he was protecting gets kidnapped, seeks to take down Mexico City's intricate kidnapping syndicate one corpse at a time.

Now, if Mean Girls is No. 1 next weekend, we'll know Americans are clearly ticked off about something.

Still, this rage is nothing compared to what I felt after sitting through the two and a half adrenaline-free hours of Man on Fire.

So, fie on director Tony Scott for betraying his respectable B+ movie past. In departing ostentatiously from continuity editing, Scott cuts this movie like Leatherface on amphetamines, leaving no scene safe from his self-serving stylistic ventures.

Who is he kidding? Scott's a 60-year-old popcorn movie director -- albeit the talented one behind such pleasantly diverting macho flicks as True Romance and Enemy of the State. So why, all of a sudden, is he trying to look like Guy Ritchie?

Fie on screenwriter Brian Helgeland, too, and his perennial Hollywood hackwork. The Conspiracy Theory scribe has undeniable talent but not when he's writing lines like "Creasy's art is death, and he's about to paint his masterpiece."

Fie, finally, on Denzel Washington for agreeing to be in Man on Fire. Without a major star, the movie never would have been green-lighted, and I would have had a happier Sunday.

So, you should use your anger more constructively than through bad action movies. Like on SRTEs, for instance.

-- Reviewed by Nicholas Norcia