Since opportunities to publicly discuss issues related to men's violence against women are so often small in number, I believe it is necessary to find ways to foster and grow those opportunities.

Rape is forced sexual intercourse, and includes both psychological coercion and physical force. Rape is the most common serious crime against women. Although the reported incidents vary, the number of rapes exceed the numbers actually reported. Rape shows that men and women are not equal because society and its customs have made it that way.

Part of this letter is a response to Paul Rigliano's letter ("Men rape to get sex, not to overpower victim," Dec. 4), which suggests that whenever a man wants sex he can just go out and rape a woman, saying it's about sexual gratification. This is not the case. Men rape because they believe they have the right to whatever they want and because they can. Men rape because they have the physical power to do so. Most women are smaller than women because society teaches us that being slim and trim is good.

The major motive for rape is power -- to overpower, control, humiliate and dominate another person. A majority of rapes involve threats and physical harm or the actual use of physical force.

Even if a minimum of force is used to rape, the possible consequence for a woman is extreme, severe and long-lasting pain. Men can take responsibility and help stop rape. Confront other men who talk about women in a degrading way because this means they have no respect for women and see them as objects. Organize groups to open up people's eyes about this problem. Last, but not least, don't rape at all -- it's that simple. Don't force people to have sex with you against their will.