Add sauce, serve.
Requiring basic preparation, spaghetti has been perfected by culinary experts ranging from Sara Lee to Chef Tony.
It's ironic the recipe for success in Major League Baseball mimics this simplistic process, that the New York Yankees and Boston Red Sox are sieving through and amassing all of baseball's talent while the collective basin below is splashed by scalding rain, trapped inside a trickle-down effect gone horribly wrong.
Trying to rectify the curse and counteract history, the Sox have continued to pour gasoline over an already-lit ember, both trapped in and victimized by the Yankees' dynasty of dominance.
It's an Arms Race of Cold War proportions, a corrupt and depressing illustration of keeping up with the Jones's.
And the rivalry may be older than Bud Selig, but it's systematically ruining baseball by creating an ever-growing divide between the prosperous and poor.
This current offseason, just one month old, has already been shaped by New York's 'Evil Empire' and its Yawkey Way-reaching tentacles. After losing Roger Clemens to retirement and potentially losing David Wells to free agency, the Yankees have resigned third baseman Aaron Boone, acquired relief pitchers Paul Quantrill and Tom "Flash" Gordon and traded for top-notch starter Javier Vazquez.
The Red Sox, on the other hand, have added former World Series hero, Curt Schilling, who will make Boston's pitching staff one of baseball's best.But the Sox aren't done there, and are currently looking to weasel Texas Rangers shortstop Alex Rodriguez, along with his $25 million per year salary, out of the Lone Star State, and into Fenway.
On the heels of this tittle-tattle, baseball's forgotten and beleaguered have trudged through the downpour, with nothing to look forward to but next season's trading deadline and the hope of a surprise utility infielder or blossoming rookie.
The Milwaukee Brewers, with a team payroll of $30 million, recently traded away star first baseman Richie Sexson to the Arizona Diamondbacks because he was becoming too costly.
Sunday evening, the World Champion Florida Marlins allowed team savior and catcher Ivan Rodriguez to become a free agent, this after the Fish were unable to meet an asking price $15 million per year less than that of A-Rod.
The Expos struggle to draw 5,000 fans for home games, are owned by Major League Baseball and will see its two biggest names, Vazquez and Vladimir Guerrero, in greener pastures in 2004.The Tigers will field a team next season that puts Triple-A ball to shame on most nights.
Tampa Bay and New York are divided by over 1,000 miles of interstate. Monetarily, however, the Yankees payroll is roughly seven times that of the Devil Rays, based on last season's standards.
Money has corrupted America's Pastime and prematurely eliminated many of its teams, ensuring an early off-season even before the commencement of spring training. And teams such as New York, Boston and even the Los Angeles Dodgers, have sifted through the game's best players, leaving table scraps and second-rate players for the remaining, second-tier teams.If the Yankees sign free agent outfielder Gary Sheffield -- and they will -- New York's lineup will feature a current or past All Star at every defensive position.
It almost reminds me of an episode of The Simpsons entitled "Homer at the Bat." In that installment, Mr. Burns, in order to win a bet, signs the best professional baseball players to compete for the Springfield Power Plant softball team, assembling a star-studded cast of ringers from top to bottom.Consider it coincidence, but the first five players in that fantasy lineup, Steve Sax, Wade Boggs, Darryl Strawberry, Jose Canseco and Don Mattingly, not to mention Clemens, all at one time or another have suited up in pinstripes, under the decrepit, malevolent and much-hated, yet dominant, leadership of George Steinbrenner.
