There goes the neighborhood.

Yes, Beverly Hills will never be the same once its newest residents have moved in.

The typical labeled boxes rest on their driveway: pots and pans, linens, devil heads.

Of course this isn't just any family; it's the Osbournes.

The Osbourne household is anything but typical. There are enough small, furry animals running around to create the illusion that the show takes place in Doctor Dolittle's house. Also, a large sculpture of the Eiffel Tower rests in the middle of the dinner table.

Their relocation was the premise of the first episode of MTV's newest show, The Osbournes, which premiered last Tuesday night.

The show chronicles the daily adventures of the "perfect American family" that happens to be British. This includes the wife, Sharon, who openly admits her shortcomings: "I can't sit here and say I'm really the next Mother Theresa. (Expletive deleted) no."

The teenage daughter, Kelly, dons freshly dyed pink hair, fearlessly shoots off the colorful language employed by her family, and has frequent fits that her father describes as "wobblers." She also fights with her teenage brother, Jack, who his mother describes as an "oddball." Then there's the father, Ozzy, who isn't afraid to confess his love for his family: "I love you all. I love you more than life itself, but you're all (expletive deleted) mad!"

If you thought Ozzy Osbourne's episode of VH-1 Behind the Music was the most entertaining hour of television ever, then this show is for you.

Highlights include when Kelly has a small "wobbler" in the kitchen after nearly causing a fire, while Ozzy sings an impromptu version of the Talking Heads' "Burning Down the House."

Ozzy's frustration with the television remote sounds like it came right out of the rock mockumentary This Is Spinal Tap, as he explains, "I press this one button, and the shower starts, and I'm going, 'What is this? Where am I?' And the nightmare continues."

Ozzy's words of advice before the teens head out for a night on the town will move you to tears (of laughter) as he says, "Please don't get drunk or get stoned tonight. . . and if you have sex, wear a condom."

The Osbournes is the best show to come to MTV in years, which isn't saying much, but the premiere was the highest in MTV history, as 5.5 million viewers tuned in for a night with their new favorite TV family.

The only qualm I had with The Osbournes was that the show is presented as a supposed reality TV show, and shows of that genre are anything but realistic. A few scenes seemed slightly staged, and the Osbournes don't even try to forget that the camera is on them the whole time, which takes away from the reality of watching their daily exploits.

But that's OK. No family is really perfect anyway.