"We thought we were in a golden age," Stein said in a press conference before his speech. "Now all that gold is turning to lead."

The man remembered for his portrayal of a monotone high school teacher in the '80s juggled the roles of sage, professor and comedian yesterday before a crowd composed almost entirely of Penn State students.

Stein said he supported the United States' campaign against Osama bin Laden and his network of terrorists in Afghanistan. With the right amount of money and willpower, it should not be hard to overpower the Taliban eventually, he said.

"The outcome is absolutely certain. We'll win," Stein said.

But he also said the nation's airport security and international intelligence have been negligent in guarding against potential attacks.

"We've been asleep, just dreaming," he said. "Sleepy time is over and we're at war because of our carelessness."

At the press conference, Stein said that students, the media and American citizens in general need to hone their "sense of history" and understand the context into which the current conflict fits.

Most of last night's audience members were not born when Stein was writing speeches for Presidents Nixon and Ford.

Belinda Guerra (senior-nutrition) came to the speech because Ferris Bueller's Day Off is one of the few movies she owns, even though she was barely out of kindergarten when it first hit movie theaters in 1986. Stein played the role of a droning teacher in the film and the television series The Wonder Years.

Guerra was surprised at Stein's scholarly résumé and said she probably would have enjoyed economics class if he had been her teacher.

Aaron Mishkin (freshman-bioengineering) slipped into the Distinguished Speakers Series lecture after waiting in line for a last-minute seat in the sold-out auditorium.

"I think it's amazing that he can be intellectual . . . and yet he can relate to today's youth," Mishkin said.

Both attendees enjoyed Stein's musings on the current events, but had expected he was going to focus more on comedy.

Before his remarks, Stein jitterbugged with Melissa Olivadoti, founder of the Penn State Swing Dancing Club and member of the series committee, on stage.

He praised the benefits of old-fashioned dancing for meeting new people. "And that way you can hook-up with them later," he added with a hint of sarcasm.

On a more honest note, Stein asked students to call home more often and say to their parents, "It occurs to me what you do for me every day."

He mused on the power of telling people you love them on a daily basis and also deadpanned an anti-drug message.

"Small wonder your life's a mess. You're high all the time," he said.

In a blue pinstripe suit and comfortable beige sneakers, Stein mixed pop culture allusions with reflective quotations, referencing Austin Powers and The Great Gatsby, Winston Churchill and Johann Wolfgang von Goethe.

While speaking, he sipped from a can of diet Pepsi and muttered "Mmmm! This is so good." Prompted by a question from the audience, he also declared that it was "soda" and not "pop."

Out of all the "students" he taught during his years as a professor, Stein said he fondly remembers Matthew Broderick most of all.

Take note, he said, of the line Broderick's character delivers partway into Ferris Bueller: "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop to look around once in a while, you could miss it."