A long time ago, an old painter told me that there were two types of tired — a good tired and a bad tired.

Ironically enough, he told me, bad tired can happen on a day that you won, only you won other people's battles and fought other people's fights.

And at night, you'd toss and turn, and you couldn't settle peacefully to sleep. And then he explained good tired to me.

He said, "I wish that I would have been successful selling my paintings. But I loved what I did with my life. And the Lord can take me away."

Much too often, we Penn Staters get caught up in our hectic lives as we struggle to find time to do all the things we want to do before we leave school. Balancing classes, study time, work, extracurricular activities, dates with a girlfriend or boyfriend, chilling with the gang, television watching, and sleep can be really hard for the typical college student.

We put off self-reflection because we would rather do something else less strenuous.

Self-reflection is difficult because it requires a serious evaluation of what one believes and what someone does. Oftentimes, it is much easier to stand for something just because that's what we've always been told or that's what the majority thinks is right.

All too often, we fail to understand the logic behind a particularly view that we take and we find it easier to hold on to our view than search out the facts or the perspective of the other side.

When I ventured to South Carolina with some of my friends last year after school let out, we had the opportunity one night to talk to the hotel security man. This gentleman held strong racist viewpoints in addition to his hope that the Civil War could be re-fought.

Later that night, I discussed this with more of my philosophical friends who told me that we can't blame this one individual for his ignorant views; we should blame the culture that he grew up in.

Well, I can't really accept that explanation.

Holding views when you don't understand why you hold them because you have never seriously challenged them cannot be given much respect.

The probability that this security man ever questioned his racist ideas or viewpoints is infinitely small. He must bear some responsibility for holding such a repugnant view; it is too easy just to blame culture.

Self-reflection is the first part of integrity, and without it, we cannot proceed to step two or three. Given that we have thought about why we believe what we believe and we have good reasons to believe what we believe, it is crucial that our words are consistent with our beliefs. This too is very difficult.

Oftentimes, we get caught up in a group mentality and follow the crowd instead of stating our true preferences.

Other times we are trying to please everyone, and we feel that we might offend people if we say what's really on our mind.

We need to get over this fear and state what we think is wrong in the world without fear of reprise.

The third part of integrity and being able to be "good tired" comes with making our actions consistent with our beliefs, and this is the area that I have the hardest time fulfilling.

If you are adamantly against the death penalty, do something about it. If you feel strongly that life begins at conception, take to the streets in protest. If you think John Lawless is way off base and infringing on our First Amendment rights, write your representative and tell him not to support his vengeful cause. If you want to help alleviate the pain of poverty, volunteer at a soup kitchen or at a food bank.

Much too often we have the mentality that we are only one person, and we can't make much of a difference. Someone else will do it. This is once again the easy route, and when we don't take action or speak out when we feel strongly, we are hurting ourselves.

I often feel that we forget simple things too, like the Golden Rule. At Penn State, and in life, this is perhaps the most important little tid bit to live by to be a well-liked and respected person.

Last week, I had one of my usual mental lapses and left my ID card at a photocopy machine in Walker Building.

I thought for sure that someone would find it, look me up in the directory, and either call or e-mail me to set up a time to return it. Unfortunately for me, this is not what transpired.

The person who found my card used it at Good to Go in Findlay Commons for a purchase of $8. I was 20 minutes late in canceling my card.

The next day when I went to the HUB to get a new card, I found out that the same criminal tried to use it later in the evening for a purchase of $11 at Good to Go and then checked to see how much money was on the card.

I cite this as a recent personal example of someone taking advantage of me because he didn't listen to his conscience and didn't make his actions consistent with his beliefs. And if stealing is consistent with his beliefs, then he has not self-reflected on what he believes and hopefully, he tosses and turns when he puts his head on the pillow at night.

If we try hard, then we should all be able to sleep easily because we'll be comfortable with who we are, what we believe, and what we do.

No one is perfect, but maybe by self-reflecting a bit more, one can be the best son, daughter, brother, sister, friend, lover or citizen that one can be.