The media really does have a say in what you think is cool.

Monday Night Football was booted from the weekly lineup two days ago in favor of the "Battle at Bighorn," a highly publicized match-up between golf's god and hopeful apostle.

So after all the football junkies mourned, they tuned into ABC and saw Tiger Woods, visibly sullen and whipped after his recent victories in the PGA Championship and NEC Invitational, play an upstart Sergio Garcia in some sandy town called Palm Desert, Calif.

And watching with the football faithful was every cookie-cutter office fellow and "I am Tiger Woods" wannabe. Yeah, even you.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. What is wrong with that is how the media is trying so very hard to make golf a marketable and attractive sport. But, ABC and the other networks aren't bringing the sport up to par.

I watched most of the 18 holes in-between reading a boring seminar class text, and even though the material could have better lined a birdcage, I paid more attention to the book than Woods and Garcia.

It just wasn't exciting.

ABC went all out for the event when it cut the deal last spring. Woods was coming off a streak of six consecutive wins and Garcia looked to be his only formidable foe since he had both youth and talent.

The execs were right. Garcia mustered a win against Woods by nailing two birdie putts in the final three holes to win the event. The victory meant absolutely zilch in the official tour standings, but it did put a sizeable bulge in Garcia's pants. He took home $1.1 million, not to mention the unofficial title as the golfer who finally stopped Tiger's growl.

But Tiger showed his true stripes Monday night when he showed the world why golf will never meet the "true sport" standards of most die-hard athletic fans.

"I'm so cold. I'm freezing," Woods muttered to caddie Steve Williams as he impatiently waited to putt on the 17th hole.

Give me a break, Tiger. True, it was an unseasonably cool night in the desert, but it was still way above 50 degrees. You think tight ends bicker about the snow during the late months of the NFL season? Or does a relief pitcher hide in the bullpen because he doesn't want to brave the high winds of Chicago's Wrigley Field?

Of course they don't. Why? Because they're professionals. They get paid to deal with all of that stuff. The weather, the crowded walks down any street that stardom brings, the high expectations; you name it. It's all part of the game. That's what the big bucks are for.

And if the weather wasn't enough, both golfers on Monday night were complaining of crowd noise on virtually every tee off. That drove me nuts. Does a goaltender ask the crowd to hush up when a 220-pound forward is racing toward him about to shoot a 90-mph puck at his head? Would an arena stop waving those elongated balloons and derogatory signs during a late, crucial foul shot just so Johnny NBA can concentrate?

I think not.

But no, golfers — including Woods and Garcia — think their sport should garner more fan control and respect than other major sports. Complete silence is needed whenever a golfer steps up to that white dimpled ball, just so he or she can make sure everything is mechanically correct. But yet you never see a third baseman putting a finger up to lips before stepping into the box. Try driving a baseball, Eldrick.

And get this: Before swinging away on the fourth green, Garcia heard a cell phone ring just seconds before impact. If you just saw the look on his face, you would have thought his best friend just died. He stepped away, obviously peeved, and then got back to business.

Maybe I'm just not a golf guy, but I don't see the reasoning in why golfers expect and demand such perfect conditions. If the game of golf, and yes I said game, is ever going to be a sport to me, those picky, pampered people who call themselves athletes should learn to deal with life's background noise, weather conditions and other variables.

But you think it's cool because someone said so. Shame on you.