Eating disorder tears apart student's life

For the past week I have been scared to read the first page of The Daily Collegian.

I knew there would be an article about eating disorders. I am sure that may seem odd to most of you -- scared?

Grow up, you may think. I have done enough growing up, and I am far from where I am supposed to be.

Fifty pounds to be more specific. I have been suffering from anorexia nervosa for two years. These have been the hardest, most hellish two years of my 19-year-old life.

The series of articles written by Danielle Chiara is something I have been waiting for; I have been waiting for any widely-read college publication to make the campus more aware of the hell that is going on in some people's lives.

I do not feel that many individuals on campus are aware of these disorders and the destruction that they cause.

While sitting in the HUB, I have heard, on a number of occasions, women say, "Oh, I wish I had an eating disorder so I could lose weight."

I am here to tell you first-hand, should you develop an eating disorder, you will lose more than weight.

You will lose your hair, your menstrual cycle, your friends, your sense of security, your self-esteem, your health, your energy, and worst of all, any sense of happiness.

People think that heart problems and osteoporosis are conditions that mainly affect elderly individuals -- guess again.

I am a nineteen-year old with the bones of a 68-year-old and a heart close to collapse.

I have lost almost everything. I may now lose the one thing that has kept me going this long -- my education and future career.

Even with the mental and physical anguish I am going through, putting myself through, my family and school are the only things that keep me going. How? The doctors are amazed that I can keep going.

Now, do you really think an eating disorder is worth losing a few pounds? You may not only lose weight, but you may also lose your life.

My message (yes, there is one) is to any individual who thinks he or she has an eating disorder or thinks a friend might have an eating disorder -- GET HELP!

Please do not let it go any further. I want to tell you that the facilities here on campus are VERY helpful. Melissa Martilotta of the Nutrition Clinic is my nutritionist, and she is caring, forward and supportive. I have taken advantage of the psychological services available, although I am now beyond that.

I am about to be hospitalized for the second time in six months.

Please . . . get help. For the rest of the campus: be aware, be supportive, and be nonjudgmental. Love people for WHO they are, NOT what they look like on the outside.

They may seem happy and thin on the outside, but they may be in hell on the inside.

I know that I could not continue here at Penn State if it were not for the caring, love and support from my friends.

Be there for each other . . . or else your friend may not be with you any more.

Anonymous

Student apathy not always so apparent

Council of Commonwealth Student Governments President Tim Daniels' assertion that the majority of students are apathetic (Collegian, Feb. 6) couldn't be farther from the truth.

Instead of looking for examples of "student apathy," I look for examples of student involvement.

Fortunately for us, these examples are self-evident and plentiful. The most obvious, the Interfraternity Council/Panhellenic Dance Marathon, is rapidly approaching. On that weekend, hundreds of us "apathetic students" are going to produce the largest student-run philanthropy in the nation.

If the campus were truly apathetic, then we would not have service fraternities and sororities, 200 clubs and organizations, community outreach programs, HealthWorks, Red Cross blood drives, the University Concert Committee and numerous other causes that we participate in every day.

Apathy is a charge that our student leaders constantly hurl at the rest of us.

I understand, however, the frustration that Daniels and other student leaders experience. To lobby the administration takes time, extreme effort and people power.

Daniels and other student leaders do the best they can. I'm tired of being called apathetic by people who do not know me, however. I take such an accusation very seriously. What is the purpose of this name-calling? What is my incentive as an "apathetic student" to get involved when my student leaders think very little of me as a person?

It is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Well-meaning student leaders get elected, then move to enact their ambitious campaign promises.

Usually they campaign on an "Us vs. the Administration" platform. When they talk with the administration they demand instead of negotiate and then complain that Old Main does not listen to them.

The next step is to try to rally student support. Then, our student leaders call us apathetic when the public at large does not get up in arms simply because they tell us to.

Then our student leaders get even more frustrated and hurl more charges. Unfortunately, this is a never-ending circle of events with student government.

What problems do they solve by brow-beating us in the Collegian?

I expect to be further ostracized from the second floor of the HUB after they read this article.

Unfortunately for all of us students, our student leaders will be offended by my article instead of taking it as constructive criticism. If I did not care so deeply for the institution of student government, I would not have written this letter.

Incidentally, I was at the rally on the Old Main steps. I even brought two friends. As we walked away, my one friend remarked, "What kind of a rally was that? It sounded like a bitch session to me."

He is right.

A rally should get people to band together and motivate everyone into action. Perhaps complaining about "student apathy" made our leaders feel better about themselves, but it did little to get people like my friends to start pounding on Old Main's doors.

The point of this entire article is that true leaders do not hurl insults at the people they serve.

Instead, they spend their time making people want to get involved.

Hank Saur
senior-health policy and administration