Cupid's march
From the cradle to the grave Valentine's Day grows bittersweet

By MICHELE MARCHETTI
and ERIN STROUT
Collegian Arts Writers

The bland narrow hallways of Centre-Hall-Potter Elementary School have been graced with a splash of red, and one first grader has been struck by Cupid.

"I kissed Katy on the lips," said six-and-half year old Andy Dutrow with a devious smile, after pointing out that he had "lots" of girlfriends.

But not everybody can hold on to the elementary school brand of Valentine's Day fun and friendship. As people grow into their teens and 20s, the holiday can become stressful as they try to find just one true love. And those even older say the day loses that special something when they do finally settle down.

For Dutrow -- dressed appropriately in a red shirt -- and his fellow classmates, the day is still everything its cracked up to be.

The class was busy last Tuesday preparing for the day associated with candy hearts, love and romance. With construction paper, glue, scissors and crayons, the first graders designed Valentine's Day packets equipped to hold the bundles of cards they would soon receive.

"I remember getting cards in class from all the other kids and hoping you wouldn't get a mushy one from a girl," said Evan Biesinger (senior-animal bioscience).

According to The Folklore of American Holidays, St. Valentine's Day is actually a day which recognizes the persecution of two Christian martyrs -- an event which has little to do with candy and cards. But since the Middle Ages, the day has been dedicated to romantic love, probably because it is the day on which the birds are supposed to start spring mating.

And although some college students still think the holiday is "for the birds," the younger generations have found happiness in their hearts.

Pat Wolfe, an art teacher at the elementary school, said the first graders are excited about the traditional Valentine's Day delivery system. Tuesday afternoon, the art class was buzzing with activity as students decorated their card holders and shared what Valentine's Day meant to them.

"It means to exchange cards -- to other people like my family and my friends," said seven-year-old Tia Younginger, proudly displaying her pink Valentine's Day art project.

The small cards that most people used to exchange in elementary school seem to be the biggest memory students have before the holiday turned into a high-pressure event which commercializes relationships and love.

"You had to make all the little cards out -- now I don't get any," said Jim Davies (junior-administration of justice).

But in Jessica Hege's fifth grade class there are cards for everyone. Other festivities include art projects, a Valentine's Day party and a contest to see who can wear the most red. However, Hege has one complaint.

"The mushy stuff . . . it's gross," she said as a slight blush filled her cheeks.

Eighteen-year-old Jann Muthersbaugh of Penns Valley Area Junior-Senior High School is also tired of the "lovey dovey" public displays of affection on Valentine's Day.

"It just kind of makes me nauseous," Muthersbaugh said.

Traditionally, Valentine's Day is a day devoted to lovers, who according to custom, express their emotions through messages and gifts. The Folklore of American Holidays cites the choice of a lover as a random act. "The pairing was part of spring rituals during which unmarried couples were paired before their participation in orgiastic ceremonies."

According to the The Customs and Ceremonies of Britain girls may believe that the first boy seen on St. Valentine's Day will be their future spouse. Some even have friends lead them to school, so they can open their eyes on just the right catch.

For those with nobody to share the day with, the protest can be a holiday in itself.

"This is the first year in a couple of years I haven't had a valentine," said Joanna Cohen (sophomore-sociology and French). "I'll probably just sulk."

Cohen remembers her younger days when the entire day was a party in school and because everybody passed out cards, nobody ever felt left out.

But Cohen and her roommate plan to send each other flowers, so neither feel left out among all the mush. And Cohen has other plans to pass the day away.

"I heard they're cleaning mats for Thon for everybody that doesn't have anything to do," Cohen said.

Christine Aubel (freshman-international politics) would rather just skip over Feb. 14 all together. When she had a boyfriend, she did not know what to get him and now she gets disgusted seeing all the couples walking around all day.

"My roommate and I will be sporting the black," Aubel said.

Even the most cynical like Aubel can remember a time when the holiday wasn't that bad. Aubel recounted the progression into her current attitude -- from the time grandma gave her chocolate and money.

"In elementary school, it was mandatory -- everybody got a valentine. Then in middle school it started to get selective," Aubel said, with a disgusted look across her face.

Although 17-year-old Eric Heltman shares the day with his girlfriend, he still does not enjoy this celebration of love. His girlfriend appreciates presents, but that's not his style.

"I can handle flowers . . . but the presents -- that's not really me," he said.

Although flowers and presents are popular on Valentine's Day, Hallmark stores across the nation capitalize on the holiday and reap the rewards of romance. In fact, the period before Feb. 14 is a busy time for the post offices in Love, Miss.; Darling, Pa.; Romance, Ark.; and Kissimmee, Fla., whose names inspire people to send their valentines there to be postmarked and forwarded.

But even as an adult, Gary Koopmann's valentine will be hand-delivered -- to his wife. As a kid, Koopmann, director of the Center for Acoustics and Vibrations, remembers making home-made valentines with doilies surrounding the words "I love you mother." But as grammar school days turned into high school days, Koopmann found himself in his town's card store secretly picking out cards and hoping no one would see him.

And when Cupid's arrow struck, he found himself writing love poems to his future partner in life. Now he spends the day with his wife -- along with flowers, a nice meal and some "soft lights."

"Engineers can be romantic too," Koopmann laughed.

But Mary Tindall, 48, said the holiday does not bring the excitement it used to.

"The outward appearance was important," she said. "Valentine's Day could be any day -- it's not as important as it used to be."

But back in the day, Mary remembers when her first-grade love gave her candy. But more importantly, she remembers how everybody thought she was really lucky.

"That was a really big deal," she laughed.

But since then, her husband, George, can still make the day a little more special than others. A few years ago, he sent a bouquet of flowers to her office in a heart mug.

"It's my favorite mug -- I still use it on Sunday mornings," she said.

And George recalls when he was in Vietnam but managed to send a dozen roses to his wife while she was living in Texas.

Sending valentines to loved ones became a custom when the American servicemen in European countries sent them to people at home. Sending flowers became popular in Germany, Vienna and other parts of Austria, according to The Folklore of World Holidays.

The couple does not have any plans for this Valentine's Day. George claims he is working too hard to think about it, but Mary might have a few tricks up her sleeve.

"I keep thinking I should do something to surprise him," Mary said.

For two people well known throughout the University, Cupid's arrow struck the day they were born. Both Sue Paterno and University President Joab Thomas celebrate their birthdays on Feb. 14.

Despite the love and romance associated with the holiday, in past years SuePa has spent the day without her main squeeze -- JoePa. But during the month of February, the Nittany Lion Football Coach is usually out on the recruiting trail.

"When he was on the road, we always went to McDonald's 'cuz I didn't feel like cooking," she said, adding her kids wanted to make the day special for her.

This year the couple will celebrate both holidays together, and JoePa is grateful."I appreciate any time I'm not on the road and can be with her," he said.

But Valentine's Day wasn't always geared toward SuePa. Paterno said he remembers a time when the holiday meant impressing a certain love interest.

"It was all geared to the cute little girl that sat two rows in front of you," JoePa said.

And some who classify themselves as "mature" continue to celebrate the holiday the same way they have been doing it for years.

Shirley Schoenoltz, otherwise known as "Aunt Shirley from Irvings," said she sends herself flowers every year and signs it from "honey."

"My husband is too busy -- he doesn't have time," Schoenoltz said. "I've been doing it for years."

Back at Potter Elementary School, the kids won't be sending themselves flowers. They are happily planning Valentine's Day dances, parties and other festivities. But for some, the bitterness is hitting a little too early, as Dutrow pointed out.

"I bought candy for everyone in the whole wide world -- NOT!"