Due to a general lack of interest, not to mention budget constraints, this will be the very last Pop Cesspool that will ever be written. We at The Daily Collegian disdainfully regret this decision, but the newspaper will continue to publish without this piece of fine journalistic prose each week.

Much to the dismay of our reading public, you will no longer be able to read about what shapes our lives. No more reading about Neon automobiles, airplane restrooms, song remakes, kooky duets, Luke Skywalker, Sir Mix-a-Lot, Taco Bell, the cast of "Diff'rent Strokes," or anything else that makes us puke.

We would rather not be forced to relay such news to our readers, but we feel it is in the best interest of the Collegian to pass on the information of the Cesspool's untimely death to you, our reading public.

Do not write to us, call us, protest at our doors, sponsor a bar tour or burn 5,000 copies of the Collegian in an attempt to save the Cesspool. Your efforts will prove to be fruitless. We have made up our minds -- the decision is final.

Instead, remember the Cesspool for what it was . . . whatever that may be. Hold vigils, clip out old Cesspools, stage group readings and --above everything else -- make sure you save this collector's edition copy of the Pop Cesspool.