St. Valentine's Day once again arrives to befuddle and amaze us all as to why we enjoy this so-called romantic holiday.

What the day really is about is $ $ $. Yup, the candy people and the card people came together in an unholy alliance to make cash during the lull between Christmas and Easter. Chocolate doesn't taste any different in a heart shape than it does in the shape of a bunny rabbit.

So what's with the send someone you love a tacky, lacy heart filled with those chocolate candies that get stuck to your teeth when everyone knows chocolate goes straight to the hips?

What about those conversation hearts?

As if anyone would ever go up to someone and say "Be Mine." Those candies don't even taste good. They have that dry, chalky aftertaste. We don't eat chalk any other day of the year, so why now?

And if roses equal love, buy them during the summer -- you can get more for your buck. Florists just wait for Valentine's Day to roll around every year to jack up flower prices. What ever happened to the age-old philosophy, "It's the thought that counts?" Now, the big question is whether to buy one or two dozen roses.

If Valentine's is so great, why do we have it only one day a year? Probably because no one likes to eat chalk.