Denis Leary -- No Cure for Cancer

Denis Leary is a guy who knows he's cool. He might be funnier if he didn't.

The comic has turned the extended, "the world is screwed up" bit into youthful chic, now that George Carlin has started to spiral into middle age.

Leary's new full-length album, No Cure for Cancer, is pregnant with mind-numbing 2-minute bitch sessions, some of which go places, and others that are miserable lessons in self-indulgence.

Yet the cockiness that permits Leary to rant hilariously about the lives of red meat eaters and smokers also allows him to take a stab at novelty pop/rock, i.e. his MTV single "Asshole."

The song, with its anthemic chorus and grumpy disposition, sounds like Morton Downey meets the Bay City Rollers, and ends up being infinitely wimpier than Leary's regular schtik.

In fact, most of No Cure's schtik ends up being Leary's attempt at telling us what an "asshole" he is. Even when he hacks up figures such as Babe Ruth or Elvis, he simply uses the jokes as a set-up to present his own resume of self-destruction. Likewise, He comes up lame when he tries to blame the drug excesses and rock 'n' roll sagginess of the '70s on a collective we.

Who's the "we" Denis? Or did all those Quaaludes make you think everyone was a shroom-popper and bong-hitter?

Dan Baird -- Love Songs for the Hearing Impaired

The Allman Brothers. Lynyrd Skynyrd. ZZ Top. John Mellencamp. .38 Special. Rock evolution male style finds itself now in the capable hands of former Georgia Satellites front man Dan Baird.

While his new solo record, Love Songs for the Hearing Impaired, spells testosterone with a capital T, Baird can add his name to the ongoing list of bands that don't mind showing off their love for the mid-70s. As the "latest thing" in Southern male rock, Baird, like some of those before him, succumbs to clichéd and flat, style-less melodies.

That aside, you can't get away from his overplayed single, "I Love You Period." I hate that song (exclamation point). With lyrics sixth grade boys are probably using as poetry to swoon the sixth grade girls, Dan Baird joins the ranks of others like Tom Cochrane and Jackyl and their one-hit-wonders. AOR radio (like classic rock stations) and MTV must be hardup.

Most of the tracks on the album deal with patented male rock themes: getting laid, getting dumped, getting revenge and getting laid some more.

It may be pretty cheap to bust on Baird's simple tunes but this album is pure budget bin material.